Adeste In-Home Care - Colorado

In-Home Care in Colorado

When Honesty Isn’t The Best Policy With An Alzheimer’s or Dementia Patient

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Is it okay to “lie” to someone with Alzheimer’s or dementia? Is it okay not to tell the whole truth?

When someone has Alzheimer’s or dementia, they are experiencing a different version of reality. They don’t process information the same way anymore. They don’t understand current situations.

And that can bring about pain, confusion, anxiety, fear, or even anger. How dare you tell them something they can’t accept or simply don’t want to hear?

Turns out honesty might not always be the best policy. When your loved one has Alzheimer’s or dementia, it may be better to use a technique called therapeutic fibbing to spare undesired stress.

Therapeutic fibbing isn’t the same as telling white lies for malicious behavior. It isn’t about holding back information for your own gain or benefit. Instead, therapeutic fibbing is about proving your loved one with the information they can take given their new reality. If telling the truth is cruel, therapeutic fibbing can be the perfect solution to provide comfort and reassurance.

It means saying things to avoid further duress. It helps keep them safe and comforted, when the alternative can deeply upset them.

It’s like thanking someone for a gift, even when you don’t really like it. It’s the thought that counts. You love the fact that they were thinking of you; and tell a white lie to keep good relations with the one you love.

Need an example?

Your mom: I need to go to school. My students are waiting. I have a class to teach today.

The truth:

You: You haven’t taught school in years. You haven’t taught since before I was born.

Therapeutic fibbing:

You: It is almost time for class to begin. But don’t worry, you have plenty of time for breakfast first. What would you like, cereal or toast?

One method clearly throws them into a tailspin, trying to figure out where they are. The other is conditioning to help them move away from current actions, to put their energy elsewhere.

Have you tried using therapeutic fibbing with your loved one?

Things You Might Not Know About Alzheimer’s Disease

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Alzheimer’s isn’t something any of us plans on having. It sneaks up on a person, and presents itself when we least expect it.

Knowing the truth can start you and your loved ones down the path of doing all you can to stay ahead of the disease. Learning more has the opportunity to change the face of Alzheimer’s forever. And what we really know is that if you or a member of your family has ever been diagnosed, finding a solution is the goal.

Alzheimer’s Isn’t a Normal Part of Aging

As we age, we all start joking about memory issues. Ever asked: Where are my keys?

But Alzheimer’s isn’t normal aging. Alzheimer’s stretches beyond just memory issues. While it primarily impacts memory, it also appears in other ways, such as a loss in communication skills, concentration issues, and decreased problem solving. You’ll often find poor judgment increases as Alzheimer’s worsens. You may also notice mood swings and a change in personality.

While it can take time to realize it’s not just normal memory problems, the average person will live four to eight years once the disease has been diagnosed, with some living as long as 20 years with known symptoms.

Some Are At Higher Risk

Women make up about two-thirds of Americans currently living with the disease. African Americans are nearly twice as likely to be diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, while Hispanics are one and a half times as possible.

You Can Reduce Your Risk

While there is no cure for Alzheimer’s, you can reduce your risk. Adopting healthy lifestyle choices not only helps prevent heart disease and cancers, but it can also help you manage your risk for developing Alzheimer’s. Your brain is equally as important to your health as your heart and your lungs. Make sure you’re adding brain-healthy choices to your lifestyle too.

If you or your loved one has been recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, get support. Reach out and discover all you can about this disease. Ask for help. No one should go it alone.

How To Respond To Your Loved One When They Ask The Same Questions Over and Over Again

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When your loved one asks you a question the first time, you may go into detail and provide a thoughtful answer.

By the time they’ve asked the same question for the tenth time, your nerves are frayed and your temper starts to rise. That’s when your caregiving skills are tested once again.

It’s easy to snap. When you’re tired, hearing the same thing over and over again can make you question everything. But it’s important to remember that the person you are caring for isn’t doing this to frustrate you. Repetitive behavior is caused by fear and stress.

When your loved one has dementia or Alzheimer’s, they are often unsure of what’s happening. And that can leave them feeling scared and unsure. They repeat a question because they’re looking for reassurance from you that everything will be okay.

Approach it from this angle and you’ll quickly reduce the stress.

Shorten your answers

It’s tempting to sit down and provide a thoughtful answer, especially to a question that can be answered in many ways. And while that may be appropriate in some cases, when you start to feel tension in your loved one, find the quickest answer possible and move on. Avoid saying things like: I just told you that. That only leads to more stress.

Give a hug or a touch

You might be busy when you provide your answers. You might have your hands full and be on the move. But when you see the repetition pattern happening, put everything down and provide a little touch. You can hold their hands and give a gentle squeeze. Or lean in for a hug. This simple calming move may be just what they need.

Change the scene

Sometimes the only way to stop the questioning is to do something else instead. Change their focus by doing something different. Bring out a book to read. Ask if they’d enjoy a cup of tea. Or find their sweater and take them outside for a walk. Even simple chores such as sorting laundry can put their mind in a different place.

Walk away

When all else fails, give yourself a few minutes to calm down. Go to the bathroom. Run to the laundry room to put in a load of clothes. Find a meditation app you like and “escape” for five minutes.

Give yourself the time you need to center and calm. Because you can only provide the best caregiving you can give when you’re at your best.

When Your Mom Keeps Asking To Go Home

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One of the most difficult things you can hear from a parent is: “I want to go home.”

It’s difficult in any circumstance, but especially if they are already at home. How do you respond? What do you do?

First, understand the reasoning behind their request. They aren’t asking to go home as much as they are looking for comfort. Fear and anxiety are bubbling up, and they aren’t sure what to do. They want the familiar. Asking to go home is a way of returning to what they know.

What can you do? Don’t get discouraged. This might be something you deal with over and over again. Having a few responses at hand should help you through it quickly.

1. Provide comfort

If you keep in mind that what your parent really wants is comfort, it can make your response easier. Realize they are anxious or scared. Reassure them. Use a calm voice to talk to them rather than letting your speech elevate. Sit down and put your arm around them or give them a hug. Try a comfy blanket, or even a stuffed animal or therapy doll. Sometimes a gentle touch is all it will take.

2. Avoid explanations

As an adult child, your natural tendency will be to react to their questions or statement. But an answer of “You’re already home” will only make her more agitated. You can’t reason with them because that level of conversation no longer works.

3. Redirect actions

A hug is a good first step. Then move to something they like to do instead. If they’re pacing; pace with them. Then direct them to the kitchen to help make a cup of tea to enjoy together. If they’re able to walk outside, try taking a walk around the neighborhood and point out new things in your environment. Flowers in bloom or a butterfly flying by can be great distractions.

You can also use questions to help her move to a different place and time.

“What do you like best about home?”

“What’s your favorite room?”

“What do you like to do when you’re at home?”

This gives her the chance to focus on things they like. And hopefully, push her fears and insecurities by the wayside.

7 Tips To Help Reduce Sundowning

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7 Tips To Help Reduce Sundowning

Sundowning is a symptom of dementia. In the late afternoon or evening, as the sun goes down, you may find your loved one confused and agitated. These symptoms are usually less pronounced earlier in the day.

Sundowning usually increases as a person moves into mid-stage or advanced dementia. You may have heard sundowning referred to as “late-day confusion.” In any case, reducing sundowning behavior can help improve the behavior of your loved one, bringing more peace of mind into your life as the caregiver.

Stick To A Schedule

In most cases, confusion and anger come from being in a stressful situation. And stress is most commonly associated with being out of the comfort zone. While we may be able to handle changes and variances in our daily routine, people with mid-level or advanced stages of Alzheimer’s do not. They enjoy routine. They look forward to knowing they will experience the same things again and again. They come to expect dinner at a specific time, with their favorite foods in place. Chance it and you’ll likely hear about it.

Increase The Light

Sundowning is thought to be related to the body’s natural circadian rhythms. This natural sleep-wake cycle is something we live with throughout our lives, but seems to become a trigger point in Alzheimer’s patients. As afternoon flows into evening, your home begins to darken. If you increase the light in your home during this process, it can reduce agitation that comes along with it. [Read more…]

Is Alzheimer’s A Woman’s Disease?

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Is Alzheimer’s A Woman’s Disease?

Alzheimer’s disease is the 6th leading cause of death in the United States, and is the only cause of death in the top 10 that cannot be prevented, cured or slowed.

While there are many theories as to the cause of Alzheimer’s, there is only one thing researches can agree on at this point in time: Alzheimer’s is a woman’s disease, with more than two-thirds of all diagnosed being women.

Why the gender discrepancy?

The simplest reason points to the fact that women live longer than men, and therefore are more likely to be diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in their lifetimes. It’s simply a mortality difference.

Beyond that, research has also shown that hormonal differences might also play a role. There has been a lot of research in determining the impact of estrogen on dementia, and how varying the levels can impact symptoms. One study found that hormone replacement therapy can increase dementia risk, while another study found high or low levels of a thyroid hormone are associated with an increased risk factor of Alzheimer’s in women.

Still another study found that women with depression were twice as likely to suffer from dementia, and women that are unable to live without assistance are up to three times more likely to develop dementia in their lifetimes.

The other side of Alzheimer’s can also add into the problem. [Read more…]

How To Encourage Eating

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How To Encourage Eating

One of the most important things we do to sustain life is eating. Food gives us life, contributes to good health, satisfies our hunger, and stimulates our senses as we gather around with family and friends.

When you look back over time, some of your happiest memories will be centered around sharing food: preparing holiday dinners, celebrating birthdays, a dinner out with a good friend. Which makes it that much harder when the loved one you are caring for starts making the process difficult. It may start with a diminished appetite, yet can quickly become frustrating as mealtimes become a battle.

When people suffer from certain diseases – Alzheimer’s or other types of dementia, for instance – many things begin to change that can impact their appetite. Appetites decrease overall as a normal part of aging. Some may find foods don’t taste or smell as good as they once did, making it less appealing than before. Some have difficulty chewing or swallowing. Medicines can also affect appetites, making one feel fuller than they really are. And with a disease like dementia that impacts the brain, it can also impact any part of the body that controls the seeing, thinking or moving process. If seeing the food, preparing it to ones liking, or even scooping it up becomes a problem, it takes the pleasure out of eating.

As a caregiver, its important to not judge the situation, but rather understand the meaning behind what’s happening. Eating related challenges can result from: [Read more…]

Re-Engaging With Seniors That Suffer From Dementia

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Looking for a way to reconnect with a family member suffering from dementia? It may be time to look at the arts. Studies show that engaging in the arts can help spark creativity, and help connect in ways you might not find with more traditional means.ReEngaging With Seniors That Suffer From Dementia

Visual Arts

There are many ways to take in art. Visit an art museum or art gallery. Or if mobility is an issue, consider investing in books. The Metropolitan Museum of Art provides many ways to view both modern day and artwork from long ago. Is there something specific your loved one has enjoyed in the past? Let their creativity flow as they view different options. You can use this to incorporate art projects into their lives. Don’t have agendas in the outcome; instead, let them explore what the artwork says to them.

You can also take this to the next level by having them create art on their own. Give them canvases and high quality watercolors and let them explore. They produce what’s meaningful to them, with no judgement, no guidelines and no predetermined outcomes. Have them name their artwork, and put it on display.

Music

Technology today makes music as accessible as a click of a button. Consider loading up an iPod filled with your loved one’s favorite tunes. You can introduce other music that fits the genre they prefer to listen to. They can listen to their favorite music, and relive memories all in the comfort of a favorite chair. Because music engages the senses, they may experience memories from times when the music was a big part of their lives. Headphones also give you the benefit of being able to relive those memories anywhere, any time. [Read more…]

How to Check for Alzheimer’s as you Visit for the Holidays

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How to Check for Alzheimer’s as you Visit for the Holidays

As families joyously gather together to celebrate the holidays this year, it is the perfect time to assess your aging loved ones for signs of Alzheimer’s disease. The holidays typically mark the one time per year that the entire family is together, giving everyone the same “birds-eye view” of the seniors in their family and how they are faring in life. While it might not be the most joyous thing to talk about, it is important to get care as early as possible in order to help your loved one live the healthiest, most productive life possible.

Warning Signs

There are a few common warning signs that people will exhibit when they are experiencing Alzheimer’s disease. Not everyone will experience the same symptoms nor will everyone experience all of them. But if you start to notice even a few, consulting with the doctor is best. [Read more…]

Tips For Living With A Spouse With Alzheimer’s

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They say aging is not for the weak of heart.

Aging is a challenge all by it self. Adding a disease like Alzheimer’s to the equation makes things even more difficult.  When your spouse is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s it can be scary and confusing.  If you find yourself in this position, here are a few things that can help you transition into your new life.

Get Informed – Knowledge is power.  In this instance, the more you know about the disease, the better equipped you will be to weather the storms ahead.  Take some time to research and find out all you can about Alzheimer’s diagnosis, symptoms, treatments, and special care.

Talk to the doctor – Your spouse’s doctor is your best source of information regarding your loved one’s health.  Come to each appointment prepared with questions, comments or concerns about your spouse’s health.  If your doctor seems unwilling to talk to you about your concerns, change doctors. Having a medical professional in your corner will make this difficult time a little easier.

Talk to a lawyer – Over the years your lives have become blended.  Both names are on the bills, the bank, the mortgage, etc.  You will need an attorney to help you with two things at this point.  First, you need to prepare Power of Attorney documents that state you are your spouse’s legal representative for personal business.  Second, you should make sure you are current on other legal documents: like a will.

Take care of yourself – Caretakers often forget to take care of one very important person: themselves.  They get so caught up in all the things needing to be done for the one they love, that they fail to see they still have needs to.  If you want to be able to give your loved one the best care you can, you need to be eating properly, sleeping well, and taking time to get away for a few hours. Establish your own schedule early on. Take a yoga class on Tuesday morning or a painting class on Thursday evenings. Keep your time away on the calendar. By creating “your time” now when you’re discovering your new life together, it will become that much easier as you continue to transition into uncharted waters.